Neil Asher Coaching Exercise
When we have clearly understood a speaker and are ready to respond, the response comes from our hearts and not our heads. Our heads tend to formulate stories about us, or defend our ego, or judge who people are, or what people have said. Our heart, our instinct, allows us to speak to show understanding and connection. The shift here is to get in touch with your instinct and say what is in your heart and not go to your head in formulating a response. I have a strong belief in people, and I know that people have great things to say to acknowledge each other – even without coach training. We haven’t done it much, so we fear that we won’t know what to say. I know with certainty that if you follow your gut instincts, then you already know how to be a great coach and know what to say that will show you listened and connected with the speaker.
1. Focus on the speaker and listen at a deep level to be connected.
2. Let judgment go.
3. Get out of your head and your ego and let your gut instincts take over.
4. Respond once you have fully understood the message and reflected it back and are clear you heard the speaker.
5. Say what is in your gut that shows you are connected in some way to the speaker and are supportive of them and not judgmental of them.
6. Practice this in five interactions a day, with five different speakers a day, each and every day until it becomes a habit.
There you have the basic coaching tools you will need to be a great coach and live a life that is more fulfilling, a life that will bring more rewarding relationships, greater success, and more enjoyment to you.
Now we will get into the meat of how to make these skills work for you and how to enhance these skills to build upon them more fully. We will then add the more advanced coaching tools you will need to create new relationships and a more rewarding life.
Buckle your seat belts; we haven’t begun to fly yet!
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